Foster Love
The past month has been kind of a whirlwind. Jason and I went from being pretty boring to having a crazy amount of activity!
We had begun to look at what we would need to do to foster here in Florida, and ended up finding a new job for us both! Starting in a few months, we'll be houseparents at a residential home for children.
Details are still coming, but the gist of it is that we will live in a home with anywhere from 8-10 kids or teens. We'll be "parents" of the home, teaching them skills, making meals, helping with homework and dealing with all that comes from children who have been neglected and abused. Most of this is not something either of us have experience with, and I've found myself devouring anything I can read about trauma in hopes for this not to be a total shock. We've talked and imagined what to expect, but that's virtually impossible. We were told in our interview to expect being screamed and cursed at, dealing with kids running away and a multitude of other behavioral issues 😬.
It's enough to make me pause and question my ability to actually do this. To go from zero kids to 10??
It sounds crazy and typically when I tell people about this their eyes get wide, while still trying to be/sound supportive :D
But then I'll have quiet times, where I feel such a peace about it and I know this is what God has for us in this season. Maybe not forever, but for now. And this makes me take a deep breath and quiet my anxiety.
Something else we've heard from people we've told is what we're doing is so great. I appreciate that, just as I appreciate the last line of this Mr. Rogers quote, that I intentionally left out. I hope and pray that we can be a positive influence on the kids in our home. But this is not for self satisfaction, and we aren't heroes.
In addition to this new job, we recently attended a foster advocacy training, in hopes of starting a foster care ministry at our church.
At this class we learned that there are are approximately 650,000 foster kids in the US.
State agencies must meet 7 minimum standard for child safety and well-being.
No state met all 7.
16 states didn't meet any, and none met more than 2.
Please go back and read that again. Whatever state you're reading this from, yours either didn't meet any of the basic requirements to keep foster children safe and cared for, or at most they met 2.
That. Is. Not. Okay.
I've heard lots of reasons why people say they can't foster, and there are absolutely reasons why they can't. But the biggest takeaway from our class. EVERYONE can do something.
If you can't foster, become an advocate.
If you can't do that, offer to do respite care or volunteer to babysit or transport kids to appointments/court etc.
Contact your local foster care agency or church and ask how you can help.
I read recently of a woman who went to an agency and offered to have a group come in and paint the room where children wait to be placed in foster homes. Now instead of ugly beige walls, it's an inviting place where kids, hopefully, won't feel so scared while they’re waiting for a home.
Follow Together We Rise and decorate/pack duffel bags for kids going into foster care so they don't have to carry their belongings in a trash bag.
End rant for today.
And if you've made it this far, please pray for Jason and I, and especially the boys we'll be caring for. Anything new is scary and these kids have been through more in their lives than we can imagine. xo
